spreadeagle
October 3rd, 2005, 07:51 PM
Hi,
You say you and your b/f have been together a year, then you say that it's an open relationship and that you haven't had sex since you met. So in what sense have you been 'together'?
Who's idea was it that the relationship should be an open one? Have you had sex with anyone else during the past year? Who suggested that you should move in together?
It's ludicrous to suppose that an arrangement where either or both of you are having sex with third parties is going to encourage the level of intimacy and mutual support that you appear to crave.
Moving in together is not going to paper over the cracks that are already evident in the relationship. How would you feel if you moved in with him and arrived home to find him in bed with someone else because as far as he was concerned it's an open relationship?
You need a whole lot more clarity about what the relationship has to offer. Decide what you as an indiviudual want out of life. And then check to see how many of your needs are being met in the current arrangement. Then consider whether more or less of your needs would be met if you were to live together.
If the relationship is not satisfying any/many of your needs then sticking with it will only prevent you rearranging your life to find satisfaction elsewhere.
Cheers
Spread
You say you and your b/f have been together a year, then you say that it's an open relationship and that you haven't had sex since you met. So in what sense have you been 'together'?
Who's idea was it that the relationship should be an open one? Have you had sex with anyone else during the past year? Who suggested that you should move in together?
It's ludicrous to suppose that an arrangement where either or both of you are having sex with third parties is going to encourage the level of intimacy and mutual support that you appear to crave.
Moving in together is not going to paper over the cracks that are already evident in the relationship. How would you feel if you moved in with him and arrived home to find him in bed with someone else because as far as he was concerned it's an open relationship?
You need a whole lot more clarity about what the relationship has to offer. Decide what you as an indiviudual want out of life. And then check to see how many of your needs are being met in the current arrangement. Then consider whether more or less of your needs would be met if you were to live together.
If the relationship is not satisfying any/many of your needs then sticking with it will only prevent you rearranging your life to find satisfaction elsewhere.
Cheers
Spread