spreadeagle
November 2nd, 2004, 04:39 AM
G'day mate,
Had you thought of tailoring your expectations to reality? Men are by nature polygamous. Marriage is an artificial construct designed to support the requirements of a heterosexual patriarchal society. The conflict between men's instinctive desire for a variety of sexual partners during their ‘breeding season’ and society's demand for monogamy is the very reason so many committed relationships founder. The likelihood of the relationship failing is increased when both partners are male.
You say that this is wrong. ‘Morality' is the name we give to any man-made code of conduct that is at odds with our basic instincts, and 'guilt' is the tool designed by society to keep morality in place.
I think you need to accept some of the responsibility for the fact that you’ve been in the same situation six times. Instead of blaming gay culture you might consider what it is about the way you set up your relationships that results in such a high failure rate. It’s futile abdicating your judgement and just hoping that fate will match you up with Mr. Right. You need to think about the qualities you seek in a partner, and then decide how you'll check whether or not prospective suitors possess those qualities. Your heart can’t help you, you have to use your brain. Without forethought you risk entering your next relationship with the expectation that you'll be cheated on again, and your lack of trust will help manifest the very situation you dread.
Best of luck
Spread
Had you thought of tailoring your expectations to reality? Men are by nature polygamous. Marriage is an artificial construct designed to support the requirements of a heterosexual patriarchal society. The conflict between men's instinctive desire for a variety of sexual partners during their ‘breeding season’ and society's demand for monogamy is the very reason so many committed relationships founder. The likelihood of the relationship failing is increased when both partners are male.
You say that this is wrong. ‘Morality' is the name we give to any man-made code of conduct that is at odds with our basic instincts, and 'guilt' is the tool designed by society to keep morality in place.
I think you need to accept some of the responsibility for the fact that you’ve been in the same situation six times. Instead of blaming gay culture you might consider what it is about the way you set up your relationships that results in such a high failure rate. It’s futile abdicating your judgement and just hoping that fate will match you up with Mr. Right. You need to think about the qualities you seek in a partner, and then decide how you'll check whether or not prospective suitors possess those qualities. Your heart can’t help you, you have to use your brain. Without forethought you risk entering your next relationship with the expectation that you'll be cheated on again, and your lack of trust will help manifest the very situation you dread.
Best of luck
Spread